When Bad Things Happen To Good People.
What do we do when bad things happen to good people? A universal truth is we all will experience hurts from bankruptcy, loss of a job, bad health, bereavement of a loved and the list goes on.
We all have faced emergencies in our lives where the walls of life come crashing down around us. Sometimes the crisis we face is unique where no one but ourselves can understand the predicament. A victim’s response is critical in how they get back to a proper state of assessing. The depression brought by tragedy is curable. Moving forward with positive actions is a key to ward off bitterness and hopelessness.
Receiving instructions from professionals who have proven methods of recovery during a period of tragedy, support an individual through the phases of recovery. There are different applications for a diverse field of disasters. However, at the core are necessary techniques for regaining strength for victims of all disasters. The following are a few methodologies for depression caused by an upsetting event.
As a Military Chaplain in the Texas State Guard, Continuing Educational Classes are required to learn how to minister to disaster victims not needing medical care. Victims mental anguish in an acute trauma is to stabilize psychological balance, so the person’s response helps him/her to function forward after the tragedy. The intervention targets the response, not the event. The military foundation in helping soldiers return to duty after being battled traumatized developed a process known as PIE (Proximity, Immediacy, Expectancy). This process can help anyone facing a hurt.
Proximity is an outreach at the event by asking “open-ended questions” to redirect the victim from their distress, so they don’t come mentally unhinged. Immediacy refers to applying reality to the person’s need to readjust right reasoning. Expectancy is initiating right action to move forward for psychological recovery to maintain reality. It is not a cure-all nor is it a quick fix, but the method has useful results. Maybe, what happen to my wife and me will help you understand a little about the PIE above.
Several years ago, my wife and I took a road trip and a huge truck at 70 miles per hour hit us from behind. My wife received a blow to the head that severely injured her. EMS arrived shortly after and applied the above techniques. Two of them attended to the wound of my wife while the third fixated on me. Medical attention was the primary for my wife and secondary was to get my mind off the event to reduce my trauma. The medic asked me several open-ended questions called Proximity: What is your name? Where were you coming from? Don’t I know you? Next, he applied immediacy. After the medic had felt he had my attention, he gave me the reality of the event. Your wife is going to be all right; you will be riding with the police officer to the hospital where she is going. Finally, expectancy was applied. When I arrived at the hospital, the medic asked me some questions to get me moving forward with right actions. Do you need to contact anyone; like your insurance company or family members? Of course, this process took several hours of answering and acting on these questions; by then my wife was patched up, and she was ready to receive me in her room. Thank God she was okay due to the expertise of the medical team from start to finish. Don’t let a crisis determine your outcome, but you take control of the crisis directing it to your end. Sometimes, medication is necessary to get some rest to avoid being exhausted.
Obviously, all incidents are different in scope and trauma where the PIE treatment will vary. Remember the focus here is the traumatized victim, not an injured person. They can overlap at times, but the point of this article is not a subject of complete treatment, but some preventive and fundamental points to assist the mental strain an event can have on people.
Is there a similar model in the Bible to help a person in difficult times? The Bible is replete with encouragement to the downtrodden. The cherished Psalm Twenty Three is known as God’s Psychiatry for the aching heart. Our modern word “psychiatry” comes from the two Greek words (psyche) and carρíα (iatreia): psyche-iatreia. The word “psyche” literally means the person and is variously translated as “breath,” “soul,” “mind,” “reason,” and the like. The word iatreia means “treatment,” “healing,” “restoring,” and the like. Psychiatry is a Greek word that means spiritual healing. The prescription to heal our depression is meditating on Psalm Twenty Three every day for spiritual medicine to ease our minds. The ministry of meditating on healing scriptures can help revitalize your soul.
Our first step as Christians’ in times of trouble is to get back to those trusted oracles of God. Right orthodoxy is the Biblical promises of God. If we are not careful, we will translate our predicament into our opinion – heterodoxy. The center point to heal any hurt is our covenant with God. God’s covenant allows us to take control of our attitudes after heartbreak. A wrong emotional comeback gives us a blurry image of our way out, which reduces our progress of recovery. The wrong approach dealing with depression can exacerbate the situation. Don’t assume anything about your hurt, but confidently know your God is with you. Remember, the Lord heals the brokenhearted.
During low moments of our lives, many of us respond, “Why is God doing this to me.” In reality, the Lord is not doing anything to us, it just happened. In a fallen world there are numerous variables for any one event. Sometimes, tragedy is without any human reasoning to explain why. Therefore, working through a disaster is the need to put your trust in the Lord for healing completely. An improper reply will undoubtedly lead us to a distortion of God’s character. Filtering God through our wound improperly will hinder our recovery. It is good if possible to solicit profitable relationships. Wise counselors advice expedites an end to your predicament.
The primary action, when disappointment comes our way is prayer, as it will revive us. Many men and women in scriptures prayed for encouragement in rough times of their lives. Trauma produces an emotional progression, not necessarily in this order of, high anxiety, denial, anger, remorse, grief, and reconciliation. Prayer swings our pain to our Savior, who understands and will rescue us. It is important to exchange the unpleasant image caused by an accidental event for a picture of victory for the future. Having the right attitude forms resilience to overcome an unfortunate event. Prayer is the weapon to divide and conquer parts of the whole. Prayer isolates sections of the incident for small wins until the whole is defeated.
King David is a paragon in scriptures to look for strengthening ourselves when bad things happen to us? King David was a man who was familiar with tragedy. At times, he was persona non grata amongst his people. Though David wasn’t welcomed amongst his own at times, God said, “Here is a man after My own heart.” King David could not have gotten a higher endorsement. King David had a reputation as a philanthropist, wise ruler, warrior, faithful, merciful and patron to the Temple and Priests. A good name is more desirable than riches. Seize excellent opportunities to build a reputation of integrity. Your name goes before you.
David did great exploits for Israel. He also sinned against the Lord. The times that King David missed the mark with God was filtering his predicaments for personal explanations, and not assessing it through the oracles of God.
Concealing God’s word in our hearts beforehand, when times of trouble come, it will aid us to respond appropriately. Our thoughts for restoration should be like the Psalmist who penned these words: Psalm 121:1-2 I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
If you are depressed, my opinion for recovery is to meditate on Psalm Twenty Three. Also remember, the example here in Psalm 20:1-4 is for you. “May the LORD answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you. May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion. May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings. May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.” Adjusting yourself mentally and spiritually with God’s word puts you on the road to a strong upturn.
In fact, the very essence of true religion is to adjust the mind and soul of man, I quote Augustine saying, “My soul is restless until it finds its rest in Thee, O God.” Healing means bringing the person into a right relationship with the physical, mental and spiritual laws of God. Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.” A good idea for preventive medicine for a future heartache is to be familiar with Psalm Twenty Three, Ten Commandments, the Lord’s Prayer, and the Beatitudes to establish discerning patterns for victory. It will do us good to get them hidden in our hearts. Now, Let’s read Psalm Twenty Three, the nightingale of all the Psalms, that sings its sweetest melody at the darkest hour.
Psalm 23:1-6 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever. The following is an examination of this psalm.
The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing: Notice the statement is not asking for anything, but acknowledging He has everything I need. Above, David is getting his mind off the event by making actual open-ended statements about God. Here are some more statements about His love for us. Matthew 6:8 “Your father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” St. Paul says in Philippians 4:19, “My God shall supply all your needs.” King David put it like this, “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.” With that kind of faith, we can work today without worrying about tomorrow.
He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. In Psalm 46:10 it states, “Be still, and know that I am God.” When we stop to meditate on the Lord, it reminds us of past victories. In these verses, you shift your mind to reality about the victories of your life.
My recommendation is to start a victory journal. Remembering the past victories puts the present pain as another victory to list in your journal. If He gave you victory in the past, He would surely do it in the future. The victory list aids us in calming ourselves down; it is harder than it sounds as quieting is not normal in a life of haste. If we master meditating on healing scriptures, the rewards are bountiful as we stop the noise around us to get back in touch with what is paramount – His promises. Remember, setbacks have a time clock on it and declaring His victories mentally engage us in positive actions.
Still waters have a calming affect on our minds. Thinking about what is true begins the process of divine action. Often I sat on my back porch to listen to the waterfall with soft instrumental music to create an atmosphere of deep thought. One metaphor of the Holy Spirit is living waters. Water will quench a thirsty soul. You create the environment that you want. By getting into the habit of meditating daily when hard times come, as they surely will, it will not be hard to draw on those reserves for strength. The practice of intercession inspired by scriptures becomes preventive medicine for the soul during hard times. The rest of this Psalm is directed at the actions of our Lord acting on our behalf.
He refreshes my soul. The human mind is like the human body. It can be wounded. Sorrow is a wound. It cuts deeply, but sorrow is a clean wound, and will heal unless something gets into the wound, such as bitterness, self-pity, or resentment. Meditating on healing scriptures engages our minds forward, so wounds are diminished. When there is a wound, it is prudent to go back mentally and, if possible, visit locations of victories as a touch point re-calibrating your spirit. If God delivered you before, He would do it again.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Notice that the Psalm says, “He leadeth me.” God doesn’t drive. As we take life one step at a time, we can walk with Him the right paths. The wise man says in Proverbs 3:6 “In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct thy paths.”
Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. The valley of uncertainty is part of the landscape we all traverse to our port of destiny. An individual man who went through a cyclone was always on edge that another one would come. Afterward to help him, his children built him a storm shelter and the fear dissipated, as he knew he had a place to run to for protection. In the valley of uncertainty, we have His protection that covers us. Psalm 91:1 is a promise to them in need, “Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me. His rod and staff are weapons against the enemies and are used for direction. The end of the staff was turned into a crook. Many paths in Palestine were along the steep sides of mountains. The sheep would lose its footing and slip down, hanging helplessly on some ledge below. With his staff, the shepherd could reach down, place the crook over the small chest of the sheep and lift it back onto the pathway. The shepherd’s rod and staff instinctively comfort the sheep.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. The Good Shepherd goes before the sheep and digs up any poisonous plants in the pasture that could harm the sheep. The pasture is a type of a table. We provide Holy Communion every Sunday at the church where I serve and the sacraments are reminders of His real spiritual presence. His healing presence pulls up any poison in us, as we trust His promises. Sacrament comes from the Latin word Sacramentum, which means promise. The Lord’s body and blood are a sign of moral healing when we confess our sins and utterly trust Him. The atonement of Christ is to redeem sinners from a lifestyle of selfishness. You are no longer a habitual lawbreaker. Your heart has been changed to obey His laws willingly. His laws are good. Following the teachings of Christ will renew your mind. It is not enough for the farmer to plant his seed. He must go through his crop again and again to destroy the weeds. So must the spirit of God in man militantly crusades up and down to pull up the weeds.
The word moral comes from a Latin mores, which denotes manners of character; more precisely, that permanent, central act of the will and heart, which constitutes character as a predicate of a moral being. Moral prudence is the actual nature of a born again person, who is realized as a benevolent being. The pardon person supreme affections have changed to have the heart to obey the laws of God. In pursuit of obedience, come promises from God to those who diligently seek Him.
An obedient child of Christ can also receive all the promises of the Father with confidence. Here is one of many promises for the believer, found in Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.” That promise is for many grandparents, parents whose hearts are yearning for their prodigal child. Divine promises construct dreams for the future to accomplish. Assurances of God’s word are the balm of Gilead that is rubbed into the wound for healing.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Sheep would bruise or cut their heads grazing in the tall grass from protruding rocks and sticks hidden in the grassland. At nightfall when the sheep bedded down the shepherd would examine each one and pour oil over their wounds that comforted them. Also, the shepherd would dip a huge cup in a pitcher of cold water to offer it to their thirsty friend. With tender affection from the shepherd, the lambs always felt secure and safe. Jesus said in John 10:3 “He calleth his own sheep by name.” I like that. It makes me feel important. The Psalmist said in Palm 147:3,4 “He healeth the broken in heart. He telleth the number of the stars”. The power of the universe is power at His disposal. I have comfort in knowing His the Creator of all good things.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever. Jesus said in John 11:25,26 “I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.”
Life would be unbearable without this promise. His goodness and love will overtake us for He is compassionate and full of mercy to those who call upon His name for help.
My grandfather was a man you could count on when in need. He would set everything aside he was doing to bring relief to you. He never asked anything in return. Grandpa was a man of goodness and leading character. His moral compass was fixed on his family as a protector and provider. Our Heavenly Father is likewise.
Recently, I was lecturing for six weeks at an International University in Mexico. I had a splendid time interacting with the students and faculty during this period. However, when I got home and laid on my bed, the feeling of home sweet home came over me. There is no place like home. Saint Paul said we are sojourners passing through this planet earth yearning to be with Jesus. In this present state, it is wonderful to serve Jesus here, but I can’t wait to get home to be with Him.
